deerington inbox;

[volunteertomatoes]

C A L L ︙ V O I C E M A I L ︙ A C T I O N ︙ T E X T

Comments

[volunteertomatoes]

eliot please look at the username of the person you're currently texting

[endlessflask]

im too tired for this shit
i refuse to continue texting until this is fixed
ps if you bring home juice i wouldnt be sad

[volunteertomatoes]

on it.

marriage material, huh?

[endlessflask]

I dont know what youre talking about

[volunteertomatoes]

yeah you do

this marriage material is going to get you grapefruit juice

[endlessflask]

oh so you just assume you’re the marriage material in question do you

[volunteertomatoes]

well, yeah. unless you've got a side piece.

[endlessflask]

i could be talking about someone else’s piece

[volunteertomatoes]

Uh-huh. Sure.

Who?

[endlessflask]

thats confidential information

[volunteertomatoes]

that you misfired to me

soooooo

[endlessflask]

yeah misfires mean not on purpose
I've seen you age I dont know if I can commit to a beard like that again

[volunteertomatoes]

i looked cool and you know it

[endlessflask]

you’re so weird and hairy
i dont know if thats cool

[volunteertomatoes]

I'm harry? I'm not the one with a beard currently.

[endlessflask]

you dont like it?

[volunteertomatoes]

What? No. I love it.

[endlessflask]

oh
it sounded like you were judging me

tfw u notice a homophone error only now 4 comments in

[volunteertomatoes]

Never. You look really good with it--my point was more that your face is currently hairier than mine.

You ALWAYS look fantastic, just

by the way

[endlessflask]

I've seen the rest of your body
we both know you're hairy and I totally accept and love it
and thank you

[volunteertomatoes]

hairy in like a sexy way right?

i'm not shaving.

[endlessflask]

you know I think you're hot